Am I Overwhelmed?
If you're in immediate danger or at risk of harming yourself or someone else right now:
Sometimes it's hard to tell if you're just stressed… or if you're overwhelmed and need crisis skills first.
In DBT, you're in a crisis when the situation is highly stressful, short-term, and creates intense pressure to fix it now. Crisis skills are for moments when emotion mind threatens to overwhelm you, or you're overwhelmed but demands must still be met.
Step 1: STOP for 10 seconds
Before you decide anything, do STOP:
- Stop (pause)
- Take a step back (one breath, put the phone down)
- Observe (what's happening inside + outside)
- Proceed mindfully (choose what helps, not what hurts)
If you can't do all of STOP, do just this: "Pause. One exhale."
Step 2: Quick overwhelm check (tap yes/no in your head)
You're probably overwhelmed if 2 or more are true right now:
- Urgency: "I have to fix this RIGHT NOW."
- Tunnel vision: you can't see options, only danger/mess.
- Body alarm: heart racing, shaking, numb, hot, clenched, can't settle.
- Impulse risk: you feel pulled to do something you'll regret (blow up, self-harm, quit, spam-text, binge, spend).
- Thinking slips: lots of "always/never," mind-reading, catastrophe.
- Skills feel impossible: even simple tasks feel too hard.
If yes, treat this as overwhelm → crisis skills first.
Step 3: Choose your crisis path (pick ONE)
If you're having self-harm urges:
If you're having substance cravings:
A) If your body is in full alarm → TIPP
Use TIPP to bring intensity down fast (temperature, intense exercise, paced breathing, paired muscle relaxation).
B) If you're stuck on an urge → Pros & Cons
Do DBT Pros/Cons: coping vs not coping (tolerating distress vs not tolerating).
C) If you need a safe break from the pain → ACCEPTS
Use Wise Mind ACCEPTS for short-term distraction until you're steadier.
D) If you need comfort (not distraction) → Self-Soothe
Use your senses (vision, hearing, smell, taste, touch) to settle.
E) If you need hope + relief inside the moment → IMPROVEthe Moment
Imagery, meaning, prayer/asking for help, relaxation, one thing, brief vacation, encouragement.
F) If you're fighting reality → Radical Acceptance
Stop arguing with what is already true (without approving of it).
Step 4: Re-check after 2–5 minutes
Ask: "Did the intensity drop at least 10%?"
- Yes: You're moving out of overwhelm. Go to Wise Mind, Check the Facts, or Problem Solving next.
- No: Stay in crisis skills. Try one different option (TIPP → ACCEPTS, or ACCEPTS → Self-Soothe).
Step 5: If you're unsure, use the Wise Mind test
Wise Mind is the overlap of emotion mind and reasonable mind—facts + feelings + values together.
Ask:
- "Can I see the facts and my feelings at the same time?"
- "Can I choose a next step that matches my values?"
If not, you're likely still overwhelmed → return to crisis skills.
A tiny rule that helps
If acting now would make things worse, you're overwhelmed enough to use crisis skills.